“Jimmy, c’mon, get up now! It’s a quarter to seven. You’ve got a half-hour to wash up, get dressed, eat some breakfast, and get out the door and catch your bus. You know the bus driver won’t wait.”
So begins the morning ritual of Jimmy Snyder, a just-turned teenager. Some days are better than others, but they generally follow the same pattern: His mom knocks on his door after his alarm clock fails to stir him, though it is loud enough to wake her, Jimmy's dad, and his two sisters! Jimmy lets out a few muffled grunts. His mom goes downstairs to start breakfast. Ten minutes later, she comes back up the stairs and stands outside his door. Hearing nothing within, she bangs and shouts a little louder. A few more grunts and some shuffling are the responses from Jimmy. She goes back downstairs, finishes making breakfast, and heads upstairs one more time. With five minutes until the bus comes, she pounds heavily and screams at Jimmy to get moving. Four and a half minutes later, his door flies open, and Jimmy gallops down the stairs and out the door. He is last seen running down the road, shirt-tail flying and shoes untied, with or without socks. Sometimes he actually catches the bus.
At school, the pattern continues. Jimmy is late for nearly every class, coming in several minutes after the bell rings. He often has forgotten his homework, usually because he didn’t bother to write the assignments down. Back at home, if he does happen to remember that he has homework, he can’t remember what it is. Then he has to call a classmate to find it out, but often he can’t be bothered to make the effort.
After school, he hangs out with his friends, either at a local store or over at one of their houses—one without anyone else home so they can have the run of the place, eating out of the fridge and playing video games, watching TV, or playing on the internet. When they get tired of this, Jimmy finally comes home, usually too late for dinner. He grabs what he can out of the refrigerator, and he spends the rest of the evening either watching television or playing computer games. Towards midnight he finally gets to bed. ~ ~ ~
The above story is an extreme, although not uncommon, example of a person who has a problem disciplining himself. Jimmy doesn’t seem to live much beyond the moment. He drifts from one thing to another without ever investing himself seriously in anything. He has no particular ambitions and lives passively, just letting things happen to him. He avoids making commitments, except to his small group of friends to do fun things together. He probably does not have a very high opinion of himself. Deep inside, he probably believes that he is not capable of accomplishing much and, because of this, he is not motivated to work to improve himself in any area. Generally speaking, he does not expect much out of life. Jimmy would rather just get what he can out of the moment, even if it does not particularly bring him much joy.
Mind and body
Self-discipline involves the relationship between our mind and body. Which one is in control? In other words, do we "eat to live" or "live to eat"? Are we primarily concerned with satisfying our body’s desires, or do we live for something greater?
If we simply eat when we are hungry, go to sleep when we are tired, and always seek comfort, we haven’t developed much beyond the stage we were at when we were very young. As small children, we were naturally immature and self-centered, with limited control over our bodies. When we were hungry, tired or cold, we just cried until we were fed, rocked to sleep, or made warm and comfortable. We wanted our mommies, and we wanted them right away—to serve us and make us happy. We could really set up a howl, even in the middle of the night, in order to get our way. If you've lived with a baby, you know!
However, that way of life is not acceptable beyond a certain point. Can you imagine at your age waking up in the middle of the night and howling for your mother to feed you—or just falling asleep at the dining room table to be carried to bed? Part of growing up is learning to control our bodies' needs and desires.
Our body is naturally concerned with satisfying itself. It’s wired that way in order to survive. Yet we can’t allow it to dominate us. If we do, we end up becoming self-centered people whose minds revolve only around our own needs and desires—like babies.
Feeding the mind
In the story above, part of Jimmy’s problem is his weak mind. We cannot dominate our bodies unless our minds are strong enough to do so. We easily understand the idea of feeding our bodies. We do it every day. But how much do we realize that we also need to feed our minds? Just as our bodies require wholesome food and exercise to be healthy and strong, so do our minds.
We need to ask ourselves: What are we feeding our minds every day? Are we giving them junk food or good, wholesome nourishment? Junk food for the mind is all the things that contribute to self-centered thinking. This includes much of what we see on TV, read in magazines, listen to in modern music, or find on the internet. The unfortunate reality is that much of what the media throws at us is not necessarily good for our minds. Just as we can get into the habit of feeding our bodies junk food to the point of addiction, so can our minds become addicted to these kinds of unhealthy influences.
Jimmy is a person who has allowed his mind to become addicted to such influences. He turns his mind off to those things that could help him to grow and develop, like studying. He has convinced himself that school is boring, his teachers are stupid, and that his parents don’t care about him. He fails to see and take advantage of the many opportunities around him, which, if he took advantage of them, would make his life more interesting and joyful. Depending on where he lives, outside of the school curriculum, he could get involved in a drama club, run for class officer, try out for a sports team, work out at the local gym, or do some kind of community service. He could take up the guitar, or get a part-time job that could teach him valuable skills for the future and provide him with pocket money and savings.
Sadly, Jimmy does none of these things. The only thing holding him back is his own mind—a mind that he has allowed to be filled with all kinds of junk. Such a weakened mind is no match for a young body full of desires of its own. He is setting a pattern for himself that, unless he somehow finds the motivation to change, will finally lead him to nowhere.
Questions for reflection
1. What is your definition of “self-discipline”?
2. In the story, why do you think Jimmy is the way he is?
3. What kind of future is Jimmy building for himself?
4. Do you think it’s the kind of future he really wants?
5. What kind of struggles do you have to control your body?
6. What is the difference between a weak mind and a strong mind?
7. What are you feeding your mind every day?
8. Do you think you are addicted to anything?
9. What kinds of activities could you get involved in that would help you to grow and develop in healthy ways?
Exercise: “A new Jimmy”
Reread the story at the beginning of the chapter. Now try to rewrite the story with a new and improved Jimmy. How does he get up in the morning? What does he do at school? After school? What are his eating and sleeping habits? What are his plans for the future?
Reflection exercise: “A day in my life”
One aspect of self-discipline is learning to create and follow a schedule. Try the following experiment: Make a schedule involving the following activities and see if you can follow it for one day.
Activity On time/accomplished? Why or why not?
Wake up Breakfast Leave for school On time for classes Classroom work After school activity Homework Dinner Time with family Bedtime
Once you are good at keeping your daily schedule, try to make and keep a weekly schedule. When you succeed in keeping your schedule, how do you feel? Does it do anything for your self-image? Your energy? Your hopes for the future? In what ways?
Jimmy's story
Table of Contents
So begins the morning ritual of Jimmy Snyder, a just-turned teenager. Some days are better than others, but they generally follow the same pattern: His mom knocks on his door after his alarm clock fails to stir him, though it is loud enough to wake her, Jimmy's dad, and his two sisters! Jimmy lets out a few muffled grunts. His mom goes downstairs to start breakfast. Ten minutes later, she comes back up the stairs and stands outside his door. Hearing nothing within, she bangs and shouts a little louder. A few more grunts and some shuffling are the responses from Jimmy. She goes back downstairs, finishes making breakfast, and heads upstairs one more time. With five minutes until the bus comes, she pounds heavily and screams at Jimmy to get moving. Four and a half minutes later, his door flies open, and Jimmy gallops down the stairs and out the door. He is last seen running down the road, shirt-tail flying and shoes untied, with or without socks. Sometimes he actually catches the bus.
At school, the pattern continues. Jimmy is late for nearly every class, coming in several minutes after the bell rings. He often has forgotten his homework, usually because he didn’t bother to write the assignments down. Back at home, if he does happen to remember that he has homework, he can’t remember what it is. Then he has to call a classmate to find it out, but often he can’t be bothered to make the effort.
After school, he hangs out with his friends, either at a local store or over at one of their houses—one without anyone else home so they can have the run of the place, eating out of the fridge and playing video games, watching TV, or playing on the internet. When they get tired of this, Jimmy finally comes home, usually too late for dinner. He grabs what he can out of the refrigerator, and he spends the rest of the evening either watching television or playing computer games. Towards midnight he finally gets to bed.
~ ~ ~
The above story is an extreme, although not uncommon, example of a person who has a problem disciplining himself. Jimmy doesn’t seem to live much beyond the moment. He drifts from one thing to another without ever investing himself seriously in anything. He has no particular ambitions and lives passively, just letting things happen to him. He avoids making commitments, except to his small group of friends to do fun things together. He probably does not have a very high opinion of himself. Deep inside, he probably believes that he is not capable of accomplishing much and, because of this, he is not motivated to work to improve himself in any area. Generally speaking, he does not expect much out of life. Jimmy would rather just get what he can out of the moment, even if it does not particularly bring him much joy.
Mind and body
Self-discipline involves the relationship between our mind and body. Which one is in control? In other words, do we "eat to live" or "live to eat"? Are we primarily concerned with satisfying our body’s desires, or do we live for something greater?
If we simply eat when we are hungry, go to sleep when we are tired, and always seek comfort, we haven’t developed much beyond the stage we were at when we were very young. As small children, we were naturally immature and self-centered, with limited control over our bodies. When we were hungry, tired or cold, we just cried until we were fed, rocked to sleep, or made warm and comfortable. We wanted our mommies, and we wanted them right away—to serve us and make us happy. We could really set up a howl, even in the middle of the night, in order to get our way. If you've lived with a baby, you know!
However, that way of life is not acceptable beyond a certain point. Can you imagine at your age waking up in the middle of the night and howling for your mother to feed you—or just falling asleep at the dining room table to be carried to bed? Part of growing up is learning to control our bodies' needs and desires.
Our body is naturally concerned with satisfying itself. It’s wired that way in order to survive. Yet we can’t allow it to dominate us. If we do, we end up becoming self-centered people whose minds revolve only around our own needs and desires—like babies.
Feeding the mind
In the story above, part of Jimmy’s problem is his weak mind. We cannot dominate our bodies unless our minds are strong enough to do so. We easily understand the idea of feeding our bodies. We do it every day. But how much do we realize that we also need to feed our minds? Just as our bodies require wholesome food and exercise to be healthy and strong, so do our minds.
We need to ask ourselves: What are we feeding our minds every day? Are we giving them junk food or good, wholesome nourishment? Junk food for the mind is all the things that contribute to self-centered thinking. This includes much of what we see on TV, read in magazines, listen to in modern music, or find on the internet. The unfortunate reality is that much of what the media throws at us is not necessarily good for our minds. Just as we can get into the habit of feeding our bodies junk food to the point of addiction, so can our minds become addicted to these kinds of unhealthy influences.
Jimmy is a person who has allowed his mind to become addicted to such influences. He turns his mind off to those things that could help him to grow and develop, like studying. He has convinced himself that school is boring, his teachers are stupid, and that his parents don’t care about him. He fails to see and take advantage of the many opportunities around him, which, if he took advantage of them, would make his life more interesting and joyful. Depending on where he lives, outside of the school curriculum, he could get involved in a drama club, run for class officer, try out for a sports team, work out at the local gym, or do some kind of community service. He could take up the guitar, or get a part-time job that could teach him valuable skills for the future and provide him with pocket money and savings.
Sadly, Jimmy does none of these things. The only thing holding him back is his own mind—a mind that he has allowed to be filled with all kinds of junk. Such a weakened mind is no match for a young body full of desires of its own. He is setting a pattern for himself that, unless he somehow finds the motivation to change, will finally lead him to nowhere.
Questions for reflection
1. What is your definition of “self-discipline”?
2. In the story, why do you think Jimmy is the way he is?
3. What kind of future is Jimmy building for himself?
4. Do you think it’s the kind of future he really wants?
5. What kind of struggles do you have to control your body?
6. What is the difference between a weak mind and a strong mind?
7. What are you feeding your mind every day?
8. Do you think you are addicted to anything?
9. What kinds of activities could you get involved in that would help you to grow and develop in healthy ways?
Exercise: “A new Jimmy”
Reread the story at the beginning of the chapter. Now try to rewrite the story with a new and improved Jimmy. How does he get up in the morning? What does he do at school? After school? What are his eating and sleeping habits? What are his plans for the future?
Reflection exercise: “A day in my life”
One aspect of self-discipline is learning to create and follow a schedule. Try the following experiment: Make a schedule involving the following activities and see if you can follow it for one day.
Activity On time/accomplished? Why or why not?
Wake up
Breakfast
Leave for school
On time for classes
Classroom work
After school activity
Homework
Dinner
Time with family
Bedtime
Once you are good at keeping your daily schedule, try to make and keep a weekly schedule. When you succeed in keeping your schedule, how do you feel? Does it do anything for your self-image? Your energy? Your hopes for the future? In what ways?